that’s how i stabbed myself
I try to avoid ATE as much as possible.
Oh wait I failed this trial to do just that.
are you even really ArcticXII then
i have an irrational fear of missing out on everything that’s happening especially since i’m not used to not knowing everything that’s going on at all times
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what
it has come to my attention that i have pissed off people this game possibly even more than i did in YTTD and i completely understand why
i have a problem where i think i am right way more than i should be when you compare it to the evidence/reasoning behind my thoughts and conclusions, and i really don’t like it when i’m wrong about things
it’s not my intention to put people off, but i entirely understand why people may have thought this, like katze in chapter 2 and tan throughout most of the game
though i will say part of my push on katze was the fact that i learnt about a ritual which prevented your clothes getting bloodied and they kept saying that they don’t have a single drop of blood on them which seemed 
part of my tunneling on tan was because i’m egocentric and part of it was because i wanted to see how she would respond to it, though this was (unknowingly, at the time) a fruitless endeavour as i would probably confbias myself into reading any way she responded as wolfy
but regardless, most of the way i acted probably wasn’t fair and it certainly wasn’t justified
so i apologize
i really need to learn when to take a step back!
fwiw when i learned this i kinda understood
because backreading my posts in that trial it was like
“wow, that looks really fucking bad if you think i used that ritual”
Summary
in the moment i was suffering greatly
which is why i prepared my “you all suck, goodbye” post which was just ‘My Way’
cause i fully expected to die and i didnt really have the wim to stop it
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I wasn’t super bothered by your first few accusations of Tanstermind, because I did understand why I was in the suspect pool for a while. When it started getting annoying was when multiple other people were saying that I was socially not MM and you would say that people were socially not MM for doing the same things that I was doing, but when I did them they apparently meant nothing; at that point, I realized that it was full-on confbias and I just needed to ignore the back and forth, just work on actually contributing to the game and hope that some outside thing broke the vicious cycle you were trapped in so that you could actually help everyone else break the vicious cycle that we were all trapped in.
Like I said, part of me was expecting to not get lorecleared because your tunnel on me would have made for a decently challenging wrinkle to have to overcome as town at final trial, and one of my first responses when I found my loreclear was “Ah fuck, I have to find someone before Harleck accuses me of having faked this”.
(By the way, ever thinking that a loreclear going that deep into the lore is a real yikes thing to come from town, which is why I proceeded to lend more MM equity to Susannah when she kinda subtly implied the possibility of my having faked that loreclear.)
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That game winning solve meant jack s*** when I forget to realise that I’m talking to someone on the other side of the screen.
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the only irredeemable thing was my default dancing :^)
jokes aside, ultimately you were fine, you just let your ego fuel tunnels too deep to ever escape 
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I can’t believe it took me this long to realise this.
Some things I’m too slow on the uptake for my own good.
Yes I just realised that I like to think I’m smart, though all it takes is something like this trial to happen to burst my bubble.
TBH the least satisfying part of final trial was voting Trochi, because before the incident in question I actually did think I had pretty good reason that it was you, not just the CON/AP post but the other stuff that I had mentioned before all that and even some new stuff that other people pointed out and I had missed because lolsubbedintwochapterslate, but after that I basically only had two worlds.
You were participant and that was the thing that made me realize that, which is really harsh for Trochi because losing to that is particularly unpleasant.
You actually were Mastermind and doing that, in which case I’d have lost a considerable amount of respect for you because the only thing worse than playing like that as town is playing like that as actual scum.
Both of those felt like you’d need to slap an asterisk after the end result, and while I think the hosts handled it decently well all things considered (like, they even made good lore for it all, seriously, that’s some fucking props), that… should not have been a position we found ourselves in in the first place. And I don’t think you need more reminders of that, that’s not what I’m aiming for here, but… I just wanted to make my perspective on the whole thing clear.
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That’s why I feel like scum even though we found the MM.
Like I said I think I failed this trial horribly when it came to not being a jerk.
My social clears were good, yet my emotional IQ was severely lacking during this trial.
That much is obvious.
Like from my experience with both games, I can say that hey I did not enjoy playing with you either times even if different reasons. Both games I kinda have been either in your crosshairs of get rid of me cause you were conf bias/ didnt want to die yourself or being screwed over by rulebreaking that sucks to see. Like I think i mentioned this before, but yeah the angleshooting mods messages to push the dat has to be a murderer thing kinda blew. It sure helped yall win the trial, and gave ya a safety net layer against losing to mm, but as a player seeing it sucked. I will admit the poe was small already, but i think I would have had a chance if that agenda wasnt pushed. I dont want to harp or like request a draw, as i dont need it, but this is to everyone stop reading into anouncements to push agenda thats just angleshooting. It ruined Jojos part 7, it ruined my game here. Like what was pushed didnt need to happen
Doesnt mean I cant enjoy games in the future with you arctic, but all i ask is try to like be more open, and not like read into things hosts say. As like its not fun as a host or on the other end to see angleshooting happen.