The crown slipped through her fingers like sand. All throughout her life, she was destined to become Queen. That all changed because of one person. She was a bastard, ineligible at birth to be royal. She searched through the documents of the person who had changed her life. There, she saw, where they had come from. Adiart. She brought nothing more than her forged documents of false royalty. Adiart would come crashing down by her hands, she decided. Her hands alone.
Several moons, and she arrived. The fools, they were! She posed as a mere Princess, flirting with the court’s populous. But, on her trip, she learned murder, deception, and deceit. And she would waste no time making waste to the Tyrant.
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Do you think a court built upon anyone, without royal blood, being able to become king, would bat an eye against these details?
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She would have guards stationed outside her door at night; she could climb out the window I suppose, but it’s a castle overseeing a pit.
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Prince. Shouldn’t they know who everyone is by virtue of being a royal of the Kingdom?
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I love how:
Knight - i’ll give my life to protect the kingdom!
Cl talks to them.
Knight - oooh. I get it.
Nice verse! You have a good grasp of grammar and sentence structure. Your choice of words to bring a deceptive tone for the Pretender is good. If there is something wrong, some part of the story confuses me.
- It is said Pretender is a bastard daughter of king.
- She looked for the documents to see where she was coming from.
- She found that she came from Adiart.
Now, if she knew she was destined to be a king, why wouldn’t she knew what family she was supposed to be? If she hadn’t even heard of Adiart why would she know she has royal blood in her veins? Because of this, I think the phrasing of the second sentence doesn’t fit with the rest of the narrative.
Since she was a bastard, she was never destined to be Queen anyway. The phrase “All throughout her life” also implies that at one point, she was a royal heir. However, the rest of the narrative implied she didn’t even know what royal family she was from.
Toodles~
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This is true
Incorrect. She looked to see where the stranger came from.
She did not. She was born in the castle she was born in.
Everyone thought she was to become Queen. However, as the stranger had loose lips, she decided to destroy their castle.
She, and the other people of the court, thought her to be the heir to the throne.
She wasn’t from Adiart.
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…okay now it only got more confusing since there was somehow a stranger involved. The wording of the third sentence and its location in the paragraph led me to think the one person is the King for cheating on the Queen.
From my understanding.
She thought she was supposed to be crowned as Queen! From birth she had believed. But… she was found to be forged royalty… by someone from Adiart. Presumably her parent of some sort.
(NOTE: FROM ANOTHER KINGDOM)
Thus came her quest of vengeance. She would destroy Adiart by posing as her rightful position. Bringing with her documents of her supposed royalty forged by the same person… she infiltrated the ranks of the royalty of Adiart…
After all, people were fools.
Thus they shall end up in her grasp. The crown shall be hers.
Am I right?