I know I haven’t been open about my personal life and what not, but I feel I might tell you a few things about me that I feel I must get off of my chest. Like I said a few times before, I’m on the spectrum although I’m afraid to mention it because I’m afraid that’s going to impact on how people are going to treat me. I know that was the case with some people in my childhood. I also have severe anxiety which I’ve been taken to a mental hospital for. I’m afraid people are going to kill me every time I walk outside to do something because of the way I am. I was afraid there was going to be a school shooter in my high school. It may look like I don’t have a problem with communicating with people online and that’s true, but in real life, unless if someone is familiar with me, I have trouble speaking to them. I would get too nervous thinking that they’ll ignore me. I’m also more sensitive which made me a bigger target for bullying. Because of this, I don’t have connections with a whole lot of people. Those connections have gone down even lower with nobody to talk to on campus and only really being able to talk to my family members and my best friend. Add to this with the many years I’ve been bullied and you get a girl with little self-esteem. One of the only reasons I’m still motivated to keep going is because I want to help people by finding out what’s wrong with them physically and mentally. I focus more on others than myself because I know I feel better when I help someone as that’s the only thing I can accomplish that makes life worth while. I’m not suicidal and I’m sorry if it looks like I’m trying to gain sympathy. That’s not the main goal of this post. The goal is to help release the pent-up tension inside of me as I’ve been holding it in for too long. I’m sorry if my actions have made you suffer more. I want to improve, but I just don’t know how. That’s why I sometimes envision myself as someone I’m not: A brave individual that solves everything, to protect what little self-love I have left. Once again, I’m sorry if I caused anyone pain by posting this, but I have to let all my emotions run wild or else I might not be able to help anyone anymore… I’m sorry
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/9d/f2/86/9df28646398ec54c867dcf13dcf1d407.gif
"Hiro, if I could have any superpower right now, it would be the ability to crawl through this camera and give you a big hug."
Basically me, I’m the most silent person irl but I have no problem talking here
When people say spectrum, do they mean the autism spectrum or gender spectrum?
Squid I know I’ve already told you this in DMs but literally if you need someone to talk to I’m here. Bottling up your emotions is not good at all for you
Any time someone goes crazily accusing you, anytime the entire town goes crazily voting you, please rememebr a thing: It is all a game between tons of them. If things do badly at this game, you can just close the thread for some minutes/hours or, in the most extreme cases, wait for your death.
It is no worth to remain on a discussion where you are damaged by. Even if you end up getting lynched, CSed, vigged or anything: It is just a game. If anything you can just close the tab, window, browser, internet, shut the PC down or anything.
I mean
I’ve seen you be just this in some of our FM games
So say what you want but as far as I’m concerned you’re already there on the inside