Let’s break this down.
“I was scared to join a forum game” – understandable.
“I thought everyone would shit on me for being bad” – also understandable. Happens a lot in some other places.
“Everyone here knew what they were doing” – if only.
“I’d be a dumb newbie” – like all of us were at some point.
“I wouldn’t fit in” – good thing that didn’t happen.