The Monkey's Paw

(note the lack of complaints about the furry part)

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Granted, but now he never posts anything that would prove it.

I wish that the perfect Punch-Out!!! game will be released on the Nintendo Switch, and it will only cost a dollar.

Granted, but it’s released long after the the Switch’s prime time.

I wish that I could be more creative

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Granted. You can no longer perceive or use anything associated with the color green

I wish that the next die I rolled would land on a 5

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Granted, in that it lands on a paper with a “5” printed on it. The die rolls a 2.

I wish that I could think of a good New Year’s resolution.

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Granted. Your New Year’s resolution is to kill off as many furries as possible.

I wish that Nuclear would always lose in every game he plays in from now on.

You’d have to kill yourself at the end.

Perfect. Time for my party trick to prove myself as a precog!

Granted. Some guy named Nuclear now loses every game he plays in. @NuclearBurrito however is unaffected

I wish for an AI that would get me as many paperclips as possible

Granted. A vendor named Al follows you around everywhere and sells you paperclips. (Al cannot be killed, harmed, stopped, or slowed down in any way)

I wish that @NuclearBurrito would lose every single game he plays in from now on.

Pretty sure it would be possible to get more paperclips than that

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Granted. However he is in all of your ToL/FoL/FM games and always rolls the same faction as you

I wish that the anime No game no life would have a second season and that it would be amazing (and that I would be able to watch it as much as I wanted to)

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he’s a magic boi

you can’t steal from him either btw

Yeah so it’s not granting my wish. He could be getting me more paper clips but he isn’t

he can get you as many paperclips as possible, you just have to pay a ridiculous amount of money for it

No. Because it is possible for him to give me more paperclips than I have money even if he doesn’t personally have enough for that

(No Game No Life!)

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(HYYYYYPPEEEEE)

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Granted, the second season is a 10 seconds filler that you love so much you can’t stop watching.

I wish I had good aim.

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Worth