I’m ooout of my heaad and my heart and my miiind
School gives all the technical knowledge
Practical doesn’t do jack to prepare us for work
I think I’m re-
Internship.
I am not.
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Trust me. It’s MUCH worse with the free open-source professional stuff like GIMP. (Great program, too hard to learn from scratch.)
You’d actually expect the program what is considered to be the best and most professional to be harder to learn. I’d just imagine it’s because universities have courses on that program and can’t afford to modify them to another. That’s what you’re paying for essentially.
I can imagine the pain :’)
I was told to start on SAI because it was easier for newbies. I think it may be the program with the most tutorials for drawing tho, since it is more popular on DA than Photoshop.
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didn’t put down the last time I took my meds and now I don’t know if I can take them or not.
angery.
Something I said but never followed it myself is that it is not worth it to suffer alone.
Last year would have been so easier if I only had the courage not to keep it for myself 
Hmm
I feel like overexposure to social media and the ‘need’ to feel like I’m contributing is damaging everything that I should be doing all around, including my presence on social media.
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the system makes it sound like it is some kind of anarchic revolt
It should be harsh to feel like you are damaging yourself but remember that you can always do something about it
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The best solutions are the ones you come up with for yourself.
In personal experience I would recommend thinking on specifically how to regulate it. Having a blurred stroke as an objective is a kind of career killer, since you always think you are not doing enough towards it as you don’t know what “enough” is.
First thing: it’s important that you realize that it doesn’t matter at all how other people are seeing you. Your image isn’t important. Important is that you are feeling okay with yourself. Try to do what you like, not what you think others would like you to do.
(For a Mod or Judge like me it’s something different, I always have to keep an eye of myself, that I’m acting respectable.)
Try to become your own master. You and only you decide what you want to do.
I secretly pretend to be happy to trick my mind to be happy but deep down every waking moment is a battle, I’ve tried to seek help but nothing really helps, just venting my life problems my family won’t work they think I’m doing well for my self now when I’m really not I’ve just learnt not to stress them out with that sort of stuff, I honestly don’t know what to do with my life anymore I wonder if there’s a point to anything I do things I used to love get boring everything seems more boring nowerdays, I have hopes of being happy again sometime soon.
Don’t want this to be a edgy tumbler post with as generic sad person with scary font so I’ll stop here ;p
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I empathize with this feeling. My friend tells me to pretend to be super optimistic and that it was what helped her, but it is still lurking there inside. I have asked my mom for a psychologist but I doubt she will follow it up
Don’t worry, I don’t believe anyone here will think it would be an edgy post.
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I know I’ve personally had a pretty bad past when I was younger I don’t know if it’s that or it’s just me generally always feeling unhappy and having to mask my emotions most of my life.
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