The Monkey's Paw

Off-Topic (Thronepass)
#342

You wished.
I wish I had food ready to eat on my table and that the dishes would clean themselves afterwards.

#343

Granted. You ordered Uber Eats.
I wish the internet crashed.

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#344

Granted. Your internet crashes. Others are normal.
I wish I didn’t forget to put oil in the pan before frying

#345

Granted. You put too much in.
I wish for life,

#346

Granted, but all life comes to an end eventually.
I wish I had (equivalent) 1 million US dollars unaffected by inflation (as in money’s value adjusts to always be equivalent to 1 million US dollars at this point in time.)

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#347

Granted. An ancient tribe in this world, where now the US are, used rocks as currency and named them dollars. You now have 1 million worth of this tribe’s dollars, which is a white stone of petrified salt not bigger than your hand .
I wish to pass on all my exams to come whilst learning all.

#348

Granted, now you have a lot more exam and you have 0 free time now.
I wish I could stop having stomach ache.

#349

Granted. Now you have stomach ache, which was how I misread you.
I wish I had a machine that made me dry when I left the shower

#350

Granted. However the machine is bad-quality and has a high risk of electrocuting you.
I wish I could summon fancy chocolate cakes and strawberry ice-cream whenever I want.

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#351

Granted. You always spawn enough mass of sweets to create a blackhole.
I wish there were no bugs on my bedroom

#352

Granted. There are now bugs in your bedroom.

I wish that I was a better Mafia player.

#353

Granted. You no longer want to play Mafia.

I wish Death Note had a sequel even better than the first 25 episodes.

#354

Granted. It’s all in a language that only the writer knows, but the writer had a heart attack and died. It cannot be translated.

I wish that every ToL game had the entire Grand Idea thread as possible classes.

#355

Granted. You roll Seymour Skinner.

I wish that I kept a less terrible sleep schedule.

#356

Granted. You no longer care about the outside world, so you have no need for a sleep schedule.

I wish that my Lich art became the official portrait for The Lich, even if it gets removed, damnit!

#357

Granted. Your art inspires everyone to not remove Lich.

I wish for a flamingo.

#358

Granted everyone in your family turns into a flamingo

I wish to be able to play all games created in their original form

#359

Granted, but you have no fun while you do.

I wish that the USA wasn’t a dumpster fire

#360

Granted. It is now a Chinese fire drill
I wish I always had a napkin on my hand when I wanted

#361

Granted, but it’s not clean
I wish my dog would stop trying to climb over me in the car